It is a truth universally acknowledged that women bitch. About their family, people off the television, even their best friends. It seems to be built into the female psyche as a defence mechanism against our evolutionary competition.
Girls bitch. Get over it. We all know we should present a united front of female solidarity, which we generally do. But being so good at multi-tasking, we can do this while simultaneously undermining other girls.
Sometimes we wind each other up and sometimes we just don’t get along – that, as they say, is life. Denying that you have ever said a bad word about anybody makes you the worst kind of bitch, a lying one.
If you don’t get invited to a party don’t get bitter and lower yourself to childish retaliation. Get over yourself. Your presence is not de rigueur, there’s obviously a reason for you not being invited. Immediately scheduling your own party for the same date or firing out a passive aggressive email will just ensure you’re not invited anywhere. Ever. Even by your mum.
Fundamentally, there isn’t actually anything wrong with bitching. Elizabeth Bennet definitely does it. We all need to vent our aggression and, naturally, if something has annoyed you, you turn to a friend. Occasionally that something will be your other friend. As long as you realise that at times the friend who has annoyed you and the friend you’re talking to will probably share a bitter word about you. It’s only fair. Suck it up.
Some women claim not to bitch. This is a lie. Others don’t consider their bitching as bitching. Then there are the out and out bitches, the type that say they like to “say it to your face” but rarely do, choosing instead to slander you to any available ear. It’s the same with gossiping (the less malicious, somehow acceptable, sister of bitching). Women don’t like to be told they gossip but they’ll happily “share” information, particularly with use of the playground premise “I didn’t know it was a secret”.
Don’t get me wrong, the Modern Miss Bennet is fully entitled to get aggy, and sometimes there is a definite need for a strong word.
It’s the difference between standing up for yourself, making a point, explaining your displeasure and being a dick. There’s nothing more off-putting than a person who constantly slags everybody off. You won’t want to meet someone for a coffee if you know they will spend the next two hours deriding everyone they’ve ever met.
Of course absolutely none of this applies to Twitter trolls, misogynists, bigots and utter bastards, in which case go for it – full fucking throttle.
(Image via The Lifestyle Editor)